a mama's birthday

8:00 AM

Turning 27 isn't a milestone by any means and yet this birthday felt extra special. When I woke up at 10:30 I knew something was amiss. I walked through the house and heard nothing but silence and Belle's occasional snore. I also discovered a little mountain of presents beautifully wrapped just waiting to be torn into. I patiently waited and eventually my family returned bearing balloons, cake and flowers. I opened presents with a baby on my lap and shared my macarons with her (she just smashed it into her high chair, go figure). 
But it wasn't until late that night that I really felt just how special this birthday was... We had a wonderful day - bbq for lunch at a new place, more cake, sushi for dinner. And yet Birdie had been a little out of sorts all day and by the evening she was inconsolable. She is cutting one tooth that we can see and possibly more so some days are just rough for her. By 10:30 she still wasn't asleep and crying (regular bedtime is 8:00 pm) so I went in, scooped her up in my arms and took a seat in the rocking chair. She wrapped her body around me and clutched on with her tiny hands. The crying started to subside and she would let out little sighs every now and again. I rocked and rocked until I felt her body go limp as she fell asleep. The moonlight traced the outlines of her body and I bent down to kiss her head. Emotion overwhelmed me and I felt like I could cry. Yes, her fussiness changed our plans, yes I would have preferred to be watching a movie on the sofa with my husband at this hour, yes her presence made the day less about me and as always about her. Yes, her presence made this day the most special birthday I've ever had. I had in my arms a little human being that needed me in a way that no one else has ever needed me. I am her mama and she is my baby and I love, love, love sharing my life with her. Thank you baby girl for loving me so much, for crushing my macarons, for changing our plans and for staying up extra late just so mama could have a special moment with you on her birthday. 

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