Wednesday, September 24, 2014

two years of f & f

I just realized tonight that it turns out I totally forgot to be a good blogger and document the fact that I've been writing and posting pictures over here for two years now! So here it is! The obligatory "I've been blogging for two years" post. Cue the eye rolls (especially because for those of you that have known me longer know that I have been "blogging" for longer than two years). So bear with me as I unload all of my deep thoughts. 
For those of you who are new here, it is true, I have in fact been blogging since 2008 which makes it six years of blogging. Goodness gracious that makes me feel old, like dinosaur level old. I started on tumblr back when there were only a few thousand users and David Karp interacted with those users on a personal level. Not with me, obviously, but suffice to say the circle was small and it was all felt very... kumbaya. Then they introduced the concept of likes and it all got very catty and yucky. Then came the wave of "blogging for money" and everyone couldn't wait to get their paws on a few dollars. It all felt very "LOOK AT ME" and side bar ads began to overtake blogs until, well until, it all became a little too much for everyone. Somewhere during that schism I jumped back in just in time for things to calm down with advertising and for us bloggers to realize that we liked things much better when it was all kumbaya all the time.
And I have to tell you I have really enjoyed the time I've spent over here at Flora and Fauna. You guys are a pretty awesome group to be surrounded with. Every time I sit down and write I imagine your faces (some of you I've connected with on IG so I know what you look like) or I imagine that I'm talking with you. I remember the things you've shared about yourselves, the advice you've given me or the kind things you've said and I feel stupid level lucky to have had the chance to interact with all of you. I pretty much think you're the coolest group of ladies out there. It's kind of nuts to think about the impact y'all have had on my life. There have been so many times that I have felt encouraged, validated, supported or just plain loved by you and for that I am beyond grateful. This blogging thing is inherently somewhat one-sided and totally vain but the fact that I have been able to connect, grow and create lasting relationships thanks to this space is incredible.
I hope that in some way I have been able to give something to you as well. My biggest prayer for this space, daily, is that I use it first and foremost to uplift. And I think uplifting things don't always have to be "sunshine and daisy" types of things, I think uplifting things come in all shapes and sizes and sometimes someone admitting that life is hard, or toddlers can be total monsters or that they get tired and order take out three days in a row too can be uplifting in it's own strange way. Because there's nothing more precious than feeling that we are not alone, that someone understands and that we're a team here. Because we are a team, a team of mothers, writers, lovers, artists, dreamers, achievers, wives, girlfriends, daughters, sisters, friends, and humans. And I think it's so important that we remember that even if today we didn't reach our full potential we can take solace in the fact that we did something to make someone smile, not feel alone or were just there to hold their hand.
So thank you for all the times that you have made me smile, illuminated the loneliness I have felt or held my hand. You have all touched my life and I hope in some way, somehow, I can give back to you a little bit of what you have shared with me.

Here's to year three!!

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

things i don't ever want to forget

I think every mama's heart has these moments daily, these moments when your heart swells and begins to ache in that familiar way. Those moments when you watch your baby, toddler, child... do something that is so painfully sweet and wonderful and you just pray your absolute hardest that you never forget.

I've been feeling a lot of that lately and so today I pray I may never forget:
  • the way she laid her head on the side of the bed and patiently waited while I put a ponytail in her hair, never taking those big hazel eyes off of me
  • the way she sits, legs crossed, on the floor and colors for hours narrating the whole thing in her darling fairy language
  • the way her face looks when she sleeps, so still, smooth and perfect
  • her sticky toddler hugs and slobbery kisses
  • the way she yells "papaaaaaaa" when daddy comes home and runs to wrap him up in a hug
  • the way she eats spaghetti - stretching it across her mouth and biting into the middle
  • watching her take Belle outside in the mornings, patiently waiting, leash in hand, while she does her business
  • the way she goes "aaaaaahhh!!!" and her tiny hands shoot up at the sky every time she hears or sees a plane
  • hearing her snore in her carseat
  • those tiny ringlets at the base of her head
  • the vigor and enthusiasm with which she smells candles, perfume and flowers
  • her giddiness over balloons
  • hearing her "read" books to herself
  • her fake laugh
  • the way she loves to help with unloading the dishwasher and putting her toys away
  • the way she screams happily every morning when she sees Belle for the first time
  • her attempts at picking Belle up
  • the way she says "oh no!" and furrows her brows instead of the classic "uh oh"
  • the way she dances until she's dizzy, which is mainly her just spinning until she falls down in a heap of giggles
  • the way her feet and hands look tiny and huge all at the same time
  • the way she smells after a bath
  • all her silly looks and ridiculous facial expressions 
  • that time I brought her into our bed in the morning and the way she gently petted my hand as she fell asleep
Those are just a few that come to mind now but ultimately there is so much more.

Monday, September 22, 2014

family photos - just us three (for now)

With me being a mere three weeks from my due date as of yesterday we planned on taking a few last photos of us as a family of three this past weekend. My cousin generously volunteered her services and we are ever so grateful, there is no one else we would have felt as comfortable or relaxed with. Plus I'm not sure anyone else could have been as patient as she was with Birdie. It's not easy taking photos with a toddler but I think we all made the best of it and ended up with some really special memories captured for us to enjoy forever! 
Now back to crossing off the last "baby prep" items off my never ending to do list!

Happy Monday!!

Friday, September 19, 2014

a week's worth of odds + ends

^ we bought Birdie some Russia alphabet blocks and she has been loving them! ^
^ I recently made my favorite "fall" dessert - pumpkin apple bread ^
I'm not sure how many more of these I'll do before the baby comes. My energy decreases with every passing day and home cooked meals are few and far between. The other day I went to the Starbucks drive through for breakfast, McDonald's for lunch and we got take out for dinner... Guilty doesn't even begin to cover it. I do take pride in the fact that I still cook Birdie meals three times a day so at least someone in this house is eating decently. 
I also am completely useless when it comes to keeping this house clean so we're planning on hiring a company to come and do a deep clean in the next couple of weeks. Have any of you had a really good experience with a specific company? I would love to pick one based on word of mouth. I just figure I can't do anything now and from the sounds of it I doubt I'll be doing much of anything after the c-section too. So might as well start with a clean slate when it comes to this house. 
As far as good news goes papa bear and I finally hired a babysitter and are going on a date night tonight!! You can't even imagine how excited I am about this. The thought of being able to look at each other during our meal and not have to yell over Mickey Mouse Club just makes my heart soar!! Though we are both a bit nervous as we have never actually left Birdie with a babysitter. Even when we had a nanny for a few months last year I was always at home with her. But mama and papa's happiness is important to Birdie's happiness and I know that this time that we will get to spend just the two of us will help us be a better husband and wife as well as better parents. So here's to date nights!!

Have a great weekend y'all!!